Hurliherzistan
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Colonization

The Ohlone Native Americans populated the Bay Area before the Europeans arrived, and managed to avoid detection for hundreds of years afterwards, until 1769. At least, avoid detection from most Europeans. Before the Spanish made San Francisco Bay widely known, in 1769, the Swiss made a colony there.

In 1763, two German cartographers realized their was a gap in maps of the New World. Their names were Wilhelm Kuhn, a Bavarian from Munich; and Frederick Becker, a Swiss-German from Zürich. After finding that there was some unexplored territory, they realized that it could lead to a colony for their homeland. They also realized that discovering a new area in the New World would make them famous. They couldn't obtain manpower or funding in the fractured Germanic nations, and Bavaria was at war at the time, so they went to Switzerland. At this time, Switzerland was a moderately wealthy nation with the best mercenaries in Europe, but was landlocked and couldn't colonize. They did have a navy, however. Mostly in Lake Geneva, but a few small boats in Lake Zürich. The German cartographers had family and connections in the Swiss Baking Guild, based in Zürich. The connections in the economically powerful Baking Guild had connections in the politically powerful Judiciary Guild. The guilds used their influence to pressure the Swiss government into allowing for an expedition to set out to fill the gap in the map, if the area was truly unknown to the Spanish, set up a colony there. But there was one problem, how would they get the two boats Switzerland gave them (Switzerland’s entire Zurich “fleet”) into the Mediterranean? Frederick Becker had the brilliant idea to use logs under the boats. This allowed them to roll the boats down to the Mediterrean. His idea worked, and they were able to set sail for the New World in 1764.

Kuhn and Becker sailed around Cape Horn and landed in Baja California in 1765. They got resources from the land, while simultaneously trying to avoid detection from the Spanish, who had claimed all the land they knew of in California. They figured Spain wouldn’t look too kindly on foreign colonizers on Spanish soil. They quickly went back to their boats and continued north. Kuhn and Becker sailed along the coast until they found a bay, a bay that was not shown on any maps. Spain couldn't claim something it did not know existed, so Kuhn and Becker claimed it. The only problem was Kuhn wanted to claim it for Bavaria, and Becker wanted to claim it for Switzerland. They were on the verge of a fight, but Kuhn knew he couldn't win, 90% of the crew was Swiss. So he agreed that Switzerland would control it. And so the country was born. Switzerland didn't have the naval resources to send many supplies, so the colony became mostly self sustaining. They lived peacefully with the Ohlone tribe there, and made agreements on where they would settle. Deciding that the Swiss got land along the coast of the bay, from the tip of the peninsula down to the base, and the Ohlone got the rest of the Bay Area. The settlers mostly ate fish that they caught in the bay. Kuhn took charge of things militarily, and built a fort on the tip of the peninsula. Becker handled things politically, and built the capital, New Zurich. However, they did not expand much further than that, as it violated treaties with the Ohlone. Eventually, in 1767, Kuhn got tired of only controlling the tip of the peninsula and wanted more. He attacked the Ohlone and drove them out of the area, conquering the entire peninsula from the Ohlone. Becker got mad, but he couldn't stop him, as Kuhn controlled the military and Becker didn't want to give Kuhn the excuse he wanted for a military coup. Unknown the Becker, Kuhn had started shipping in Bavarian mercenaries, as many as he could without attracting too much attention. He added them to the ranks of his army. Even Bavarian military advisors came to give aid and training to the military. Becker knew something was up, and did his best to gather some forces, but Kuhn controlled the bay and the navy. In 1768, Kuhn used this power to control trade and start secretly searching ships that entered the bay. Once word reached Becker, for he still had some Swiss allies in the military, he realized that he was becoming a puppet of Kuhn, and so he took matters into his own hands. In 1770, Kuhn decided the time was right. He marched on New Zurich with 1,200 troops, and 80% of it was Bavarian or loyal to Kuhn. Becker had not been idle, though, and he was ready; or at least as ready as he'd ever be. The army marching towards the capital was larger than he'd expected, but no matter, his "allies" would arrive. It was time for phase 1, he sent a messenger to the approaching army. The army kept marching, but watched him warily. The messenger took out a musket and shot it into the air. A Bavarian lieutenant shot him off of his horse. The damage was done, it signaled a mutiny in all of the Swiss troops, who caused chaos within Kuhn's ranks. He knew all this bought him was time, so he started phase 2, sending a messenger over a nearby hill. A little over a year beforehand he had told the Spanish about the bay, and how foreigners were trying to colonize it. A few days ago he had gone to them again, telling them the foreigners were disorganized, and now would be a good time to strike. His messenger told the Spanish that the troops were in chaos, and, if they wanted to win, they should attack. And so the Spanish attacked, but with over 2,000 troops. They began to slaughter both the mutineers and Bavarians alike. The Spanish came with a larger army than he had anticipated, and so were winning a lot more quickly, too. He called upon phase three, and sent a messenger into the woods. A few minutes later, the Ohlone came charging out. Becker had convinced them that both the evil colonizers who were taking their land were in disarray, and now was the time to attack. The Ohlone came out of the forest over 5,000 strong. But the Spanish were still too powerful, and broke all three opposing armies. Becker had expected the Ohlone to win, and realized that he had caused the downfall of the colony of Hurliherzistan. Kuhn managed to escape the battle and fortify himself with some of his last troops inside the Kuhn Fortress, which will later be known as the Fortress of Konrad.
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  • Home
  • News
    • 2022 News >
      • 27/02/2022 - Statement of Support for Ukraine
    • 2021 News >
      • 26/10/2021 - Election Results
    • 2020 News >
      • 31/10/2020 - Election Results
      • 25/10/2020 - Current Election Breakdown
      • 01/09/2020 - New Grand Magistrate
      • 07/03/2020 - Massive Legislative Push
      • 27/01/2020 - War Averted?
      • 27/01/2020 - Hurliherzistan Expansion
    • 2019 News >
      • 24/11/19 - Consul Kelly Fired!
      • 23/11/19 - Grand Magistrate Pattarelli Confirmed
      • 06/11/19 - The Cabinet
      • 26/10/19 - Election Results
      • 21/10/19 - Voter Apathy?
      • 15/09/19 - Consul Ring Promoted
      • 08/09/19 - New Hamburg Unrepresented?
      • 05/09/19 - Rosario Camacho Drops Out
      • 15/08/19 - Sandy Herz Drops Out
  • Territory
    • Provinces >
      • New Switzerland
      • New Bavaria
      • New Brandenburg
    • Claims
    • Recognition
  • Government
    • Constitution
    • Legislature >
      • Bills
      • Amendments
      • Failed Legislature
      • Write Legislature
    • Branches >
      • Executive >
        • Military
        • Departments
        • Agencies
        • Königsbefehle
        • Outlaws >
          • Previous Outlaws
      • Legislative
      • Judicial
    • Current Government >
      • Supreme Consul
      • Senators >
        • Primary Senator
        • Senator of New Bavaria
        • Senator of New Brandenburg
      • Grand Magistrate
      • Department Leadership >
        • Consul of Immigration
        • Consul of War
        • Consul of Economics
        • Consul of Law
        • Consul of Foreign Affairs
  • History
    • Official Hurliherzistan History >
      • Early Colonization
      • The Siege of Konrad
      • First Colonial War
      • Second Colonial War
      • Revolution
      • Coup d'état
    • Hurliherzistan History According to Historians >
      • Declaration of Independence
      • Coup d'état
      • Youstra Coups
  • Citizenship
  • Get Involved
    • Register to Vote!
    • Political Parties
  • Trivia
  • Contact